Yes, I DO have Cheap Friends

Tamer complains about $2 subway rides, walks in the freezing cold to avoid paying for a taxi. Then pays Spritzer $35 to pick a game for him. BLov bitches about a $7 sandwich, would rather have a $3 slice of pizza for dinner. Then wants to drop a load at the strip club. Leaves me $1 to cover cost of entire Pringles that he consumed - chips cost $2.50 by the way. I refunded his money, pay me in full or don't pay me. My brother, perhaps the cheapest of all. Refuses to pay his debts, will spend countless money on Cubs tickets, nothing on gifts for others. Danny - cuts his own lawn rather than pay a professional. Buys a home, doesn't furnish it for years. Wedding ring soon to be bought off ebay. Once a Schector, always a Schector. Big doesn't pay his debts - owes me a dinner - Toddy bitches about paying his phone bill. Both spring for a one-time-only housekeeper; yes, miracles do happen. Woman likely to return sometime in '08. Nutlow, owes me a cumload. Fails to pay his debts in a timely manner. "I don't have a checkbook," he says. I need a collection agency to go after this guy. To be continued shortly with running updates of cheapness.